Category Archives: Culture Clash

Speaking in opposites

Business language can be backwards in its approach.

In a recent industry-wide webinar, I observed people speaking about their businesses.

One person used a word starting with the letter k (a synonym for ending life) and he meant it as a compliment of how well he performed a recent presentation to potential business colleagues.

Another talked about massive growth and used a word beginning with b.

(actual words omitted because I don’t need some search engine flagging my blog as violent)

And the presenter challenged the crowd with a common question: “How bad do you want it?”

These statements got me thinking about how our subconscious mind interprets language.

In personal development books and seminars I learned how the subconscious mind interprets language. It is like a 3 or 4 year old child, taking things literally, regardless of how old we are or how many years of school we attended.

So I started asking myself, “Do we really want to end our businesses? Do we want them to expand so quickly and unsustainably that they disintegrate and burn everything in their vicinity?”

Well, not really. Those words are metaphors for enrolling everyone, or for rapidly expanding growth.

And it’s truly not “bad” to want something… it’s another way of saying I want it STRONGLY.

Scoff if you wish at what seems like verbal nit-picking … but realize the center of motivation and goal setting listens to the literal. Yes, your internal toddler controls your goal-setting.

Consider these alternate phrases:

“I wow’d everyone!” “Momentum!” and “How strongly do you want it?” are three suggested substitutions.

Watch your language… it can program you for success or failure, even inadvertently.

–LYnn Selwa, “The Rocket Science Coach” ™

#lynnselwa #therocketsciencecoach #watchyourlanguage #language #literal #opposites #speaking #speakinginopposites

“The rich get richer”

In the past 24 hours, my business mentor posted that common saying on social media. He asked, How does that make you feel? Does it turn you off? Turn you on?

Here’s my reply.

It makes me curious.

I ask, “Why do you say that?”

If it’s an observation, then I feel excited…that’s a person who *might* be open to what I have to offer (learning a method to join “the richer”), or who might have a growth mindset.

If it is an excuse to stay stuck, then I feel frustrated and sad that they’re not ready to meet the generous and high-integrity people I have met nor to learn the amazing things I have learned on this financial journey.

How do you react to the original statement?

–LYnn Selwa, “The Rocket Science Coach” ™

#lynnselwa #therocketsciencecoach #therichgetricher #richgetricher #mindset #prosperity

Don’t Throw Up.

One of my Facebook friends posted a link to an article regarding people who have large wealth and issues they face, with a comment of “Try not to throw up when you read this.”

I chose to respond in public, from my experiences & research, on his Timeline.

Here is my point of view, with a few corrections of grammar:

(It’s long and worth the read.)
(Pay attention to your emotions as you read… you’ll see why at the end.)

The issues raised in this article are relevant. I have been friends with several wealthy families over my lifetime. Two families in particular made it clear to their children they would be severely punished if said children taunted less fortunate ones or bragged about their wealth. (Those children attended my grade schools and were some of the kindest people I have ever known.)

Being judged for one uncontrollable aspect of their lives (being born to wealthy parents) is as damaging as being judged for other uncontrollable things: height, eye color, skin color, genealogy.

Some who have inherited large sums struggle with the ethics of how that money was created, and how one might invest or donate it to create the best improvement in the world. Some are wondering who likes them for themselves… or who simply likes them for their money.

Some struggle with addiction to alcohol, other drugs, gambling, or purchased intercourse because of huge pressure to behave a certain way combined with the easy access to the funds to buy the stuff in the first place. (Drug abuse happens more often with people who can easily afford to purchase it!)

Some struggle with a life purpose because they don’t have a built-in financial incentive to work for a living. Or they are stressed because of an abundance of choices of what field or work they want to pursue.

Some struggle with guilt because they know money can solve many problems and they know they cannot singlehandedly solve a large-scale problem. Some know they can easily afford to replace a “lemon” car, and they don’t want to insult others at work or in social gatherings by saying, “That’s easy.”

Some struggle with guilt or debilitating anger because the trust fund’s existence was not discussed and so the recipient feels overwhelmed and paralyzed when said moneys are revealed or received. In the case of inheritances, the money itself can trigger guilt, depression, or anger because it came in exchange for the life of a loved one.

Some are working to change the economic laws so inheritances are taxed more heavily and/or more economic opportunities are provided to the ordinary citizen.

A day after posting those comments on Facebook, I add these topics that popped into my head early this morning: the challenges regarding picking a spouse and hurt feelings that might arise over the signing of a prenuptial agreement. If one inherits a business, making financial decisions for that entity affects not only one’s immediate family but also hundreds if not thousands of employees and THEIR families.

And now…

A founder of a INC 500 company taught me an important lesson about money:

“If you judge other people negatively about the way they use their money, you chase away your own prosperity.”

So reflect on what you felt (emotions, any judgments) as you were reading my comments.

What can you learn from your own reactions?

I encourage you … don’t throw up.

–LYnn Selwa, “The Rocket Science Coach” ™

P.S. Silent & calm discernment such as “I would have used the money for _____________” is constructive because it helps you refine your personal money goals. It is a world apart in intention and mindset from a harsh judgment such as “You shouldn’t have bought that!”

#lynnselwa #lynnselwaTRSC #TheRocketScienceCoach #mlm #money #dontthrowup #prosperity #discernment #prosperityconsciousness #prenup #prenuptialagreement #inherit #intention


In charge but feeling depressed?

When enrolling with a direct sales, party plan, or network marketing company, many people are stepping far away from the path predicted by their parents and friends.

That new direction promises many thrilling rewards, and it also comes with an additional set of stressors. Some are anxiety-producing simply because they are new to us… we don’t have any experience of our own, or from our families, to guide us.

And some stressors are simply more daunting than the relative safety of collecting a paycheck. Being responsible for RUNNING the business that generates the paycheck can be a heavy load to bear. The applause can be soaring and the tribulations can feel overwhelming. Know your journey might be private, yet your situation is similar to many other entrepreneurs’ experiences.

If you find yourself feeling isolated, depressed, or wondering if the planet would be better off without you, please seek help from a trained medical professional.

You Matter In This World.

–LYnn Selwa, “The Rocket Science Coach” ™

#lynnselwa #lynnselwaTRSC #TheRocketScienceCoach

#directsales #mlm #networkmarketing #partyplan #isolation #depression #doyoufeelisolatedordepressed #mentalhealth

The lure of optimization

In Direct Sales and Network Marketing emphasis is placed on teaching a duplicatable system.

But the engineer in me asks, “How can we make this more efficient?”

The engineer wants to tinker. To streamline and automate. To eliminate the excess.

Sometimes the two sides clash.

It’s true, technology is a larger part of our lives each year.

The question is, At what point does tinkering become a problem?

Do we really need a new comp plan, presentation, or training? MUST they be accessible through an app? If we increase enrollment through automation, do we risk losing the personal touch that bonds teams together at renewal time?

Each company struggles with these questions.

There’s no straightforward answer. Just understand that as technically-trained people, we are simultaneously drawn to following procedures AND looking to optimize.

My suggestion is to keep an eye out for ways the presentation and training can become more efficient while keeping (or increasing) the current level of clarity. Send those suggestions to your home office.

Then tell the optimizing technician in you to take a back seat, and follow the established process.

It’s exciting to innovate, but it’s more satisfying to watch your own team duplicate… and receive your increasing residual income checks.

–LYnn Selwa, “The Rocket Science Coach” ™

#lynnselwa #lynnselwaTRSC #TheRocketScienceCoach #networkmarketing #engineer #thelureofoptimization #residualincome #directsales

The Rhythm of Perfectionism

sepia square Hand on drum

One of my personal struggles is with perfectionism.

As an engineer, being precise was an asset. Making sure– doubly sure– the numbers and analysis were correct could save a million-dollar satellite… or save lives for staffed missions. Plus, my continued employment hinged on how consistently and quickly I could be precise.

In contrast, in network marketing the mindset for outreach is  “good enough” and “just do it.” As motivational speaker T. Harv Eker is known to say, “Ready, Fire, Aim.”

Can you imagine I found it difficult to adopt the new mindset? And in some ways, I’m still dealing with that “perfection” mindset. It creeps into my business in subtle ways.

Do you find yourself saying, “I need more practice, more information, another training session, more time, a cleaner desk?”

That’s the voice of perfectionism talking.

It has a cadence:

Practice, practice, practice, practice, practice, practice, Do, Adjust. (and maybe hide for a while, if the Do-ing didn’t go smoothly)

Does that rhythm sound familiar?

If you have similar challenges, you have plenty of company! And you might receive some benefit from reading this post by Seth Godin.

In the 18+ years I have worked in the network marketing profession, I have learned to catch myself earlier and earlier, and change the beat to

Practice, Do, Adjust, Do, Adjust, Do, Do, Do.

Let it be OK to mess up a little in your presentation. It makes you more human and relatable.

Scared about messing up? Imagine your potential distributors are saying to themselves,

“If that’s their best presentation, and they’re making money, well I’m gonna be a ROCK STAR in this business by comparison!”

(you can stumble your way to success!)

Choose the beat of the MLM drum, and stumble your way to success if you need to!

–LYnn Selwa, “The Rocket Science Coach” ™

#lynnselwa #lynnselwaTRSC #TheRocketScienceCoach #networkmarketing #mlm #THarvEker #SethGodin #perfectionism #TheRhythmOfPerfectionism #drum #rhythm #StumbleYourWayToSuccess

Personal vs. Business Investing

In many households we are taught, “Don’t go into debt.” Some media celebrities tell people to pay off their credit cards then cut them up.

That’s advice — good or bad —  for a person’s household (or personal life).

And as technically-trained people, our schooling has likely emphasized being quote “conservative” with our resources.

When it’s time to grow a business… what should we do? Do the same rules apply? recently published an article about common money mistakes. I suggest you check out Quote #3 from Lena Presley Gott.

(The lawyers make me say… I am not a professional financial adviser, and this is not provided as financial advice. Please consult with your adviser if you have questions. Invest and spend at your own risk.)

–LYnn Selwa, “The Rocket Science Coach” ™

#lynnselwa #lynnselwaTRSC #therocketsciencecoach #mlm #networkmarketing #residualincome #gooddebt

Can an overactive imagination make you successful?

My sponsor once observed that

I tend to focus on the negative–

on finding and fixing the flaws that would prevent success.

(I attribute it to my engineering training… assume the vehicle will launch successfully because you have eliminated everything that COULD go wrong. Or know how to fix it if it DOES. Or you have backup systems to handle a flaw. Because many hours were spent on guessing and predicting “what COULD go wrong.” )

Years later, in my network marketing business, my imagination can run away from me, wondering what “she” will say, what “he” will do, the challenging logistics of people coming together in the right combinations… in other words, cooking up all types of ways this could fail!

In contrast,

most personal development literature concentrates on the positive– what is going right and the rosy future–  and seems to ignore or “wish away” those stumbling blocks.

Which seems ignorant and foolish to many technically-trained people.

How to bridge the gap?

Let your strong sense of awareness and active mind work in your favor. Become an “inverse paranoid”. Check out this video!

–LYnn Selwa, “The Rocket Science Coach” ™

#lynnselwa #lynnselwaTRSC #therocketsciencecoach #orbitalmlm

What causes distributors to “overprepare”?

Happy New Year to everyone and Welcome to all new subscribers, with a special hello to those who joined after reading my Networking Times article. I hope you find helpful insights for your independent distributorship business on this blog.

So… why do scientifically and technically trained network marketers and direct sellers “overprepare”… they’re ‘getting ready to get ready’… before marketing their businesses?

Here’s my opinion.

One word: fear.

But how to overcome it?

First, step inside their minds.

These are people who spent years in primary, secondary, college (and even graduate or post-graduate) schools, specifically studying the details of mathematics and science.

Solving difficult math problems. Understanding the assumptions (simplifications) used and what are their limitations (air flowing over a jetliner’s wings behaves quite differently from the superheated air surrounding the Space Shuttle during atmospheric re-entry).

Experiencing the temperamental behavior of chemicals in the laboratory. Observing the laws of physics and biological processes. How one wrong keyboard character can crash a 300-line computer program.

Separating correlation (things happening at the same time or seeming to cause a result) from causation (what really triggered the reaction).

In a nutshell: They are trained to identify and follow procedures and rules.

You might call such a person “methodical.”

So, let’s use that trait to help our technical distributors.

My suggestion: develop sufficient structure in their outreach plan and do role-playing until they’re relatively comfortable with using the plan.

What is “sufficient”?

Again, the technical distributors look at this much more conservatively than you might imagine.

For example, in rocket science, engineers deal with eliminating as many unknowns as possible, to create a probability of launch vehicle mission success higher than 99%. That’s called six-sigma reliability. Yep, that might seem a little crazy… but would you want to fly aboard a spacecraft that quote “might” get to its destination? In this arena, that high level of sufficiency is a good thing!

Your scientific distributors are struggling with this concept of “sufficient.” They sense the need for structure (scripts, the step-by-step process of giving a presentation or training a new distributor, how to handle objections) and likely are applying the levels of sufficiency they learned in their technical careers.

Sponsors Can: realize your distributor is learning a new way of thinking. (Ask yourself, How lost would you be if you were thrust into their job?) Help them create a strong and detailed structure for marketing their business and ROLE PLAY with them until they feel more comfortable.

You will likely find that the more role playing they do, the less detail they need to consciously write into their action plan or outreach process.

Distributors Can: understand they are trying to eliminate the feeling of fear by applying large amounts of detail to their plan of action. That is an approach that boosts reliability in the technical job but can be a huge stumbling block in a direct sales/network marketing business. So, create a step-by-step written or typed action plan and role play it with your sponsor or another person. Challenge yourself to gradually transition from word-for-word detail to bullet points, and then later to aim for speaking the words that pop into your mind. Understand that the feeling of fear may never go away, and that’s OK. When you are reasonably prepared, you are still competent even while feeling fearful. And in contrast to the scientific work you do on the job, no one will die if you mess up your prospecting phone call or presentation. In fact, a little human stumbling makes the presenter more believable.

-LYnn, “The Rocket Science Coach” ™

P.S. If you found this post helpful, please share it with a distributor or sponsor who fits this “overprepare” pattern.

Culture Clash: “Just the facts, m’am.”

Engineers spend years studying facts in their classwork.

Laws of gravity and mechanical leverage.

The rules of mathematics.

The sometimes-exasperating way a computer will do exactly what your lines of programming say… even if it wasn’t what you intended.

What you can ignore, and what must you account for. And how to apply your knowledge in an inexact world.

Mistakes can be costly: a bad yearly performance review, millions of dollars in recalled product, your job, or even the passenger’s life in the case of an automobile or aircraft failure.

As an aerospace engineer, I was taught that storytelling was a time-wasting distraction in a meeting, and sometimes was a way to distract from numbers that were not pleasing… and to be on guard for those effects when stories were being told.

In the world of the engineer, facts are crucial.

In comparison network marketing places the emphasis on telling stories.

The thrill of discovery of the product. The perseverance of the founder.

How you found your current company.

Tales of celebrations when milestones were reached.

An innocent misstatement of a detail doesn’t necessarily negate the lesson taught in the story.

And trying to learn (and teach) all the facts about your company’s pay plan can be paralyzing to the growth of your distributor organization.

I propose a balanced solution.

Engineers Can: build the skills of engaging storytelling.
A reasonable number of facts can be woven into a presentation, or simply held in memory until the question is asked.

To Communicate With Engineers: tell stories but be ready with your facts!
Be prepared to give a one-sentence synopsis of your story’s lesson that includes an important fact, such as “We sold ___% more product in 2012 compared to 2011.” Third party tools (such as DVDs and links to research articles about the product) can be helpful to present facts.

In A Nutshell:
If your stories seem outlandish to an engineer, they will become believable if you can back them up with verifiable facts.