Monthly Archives: December 2018

A Year, A Green Mirror

Each year brings its unique challenges. Sometimes our efforts result in exactly what we want, and others leave us short of our goals.

Our businesses reflect these situations to us at different speeds.

Nowadays, many companies pay on a weekly or daily basis with a direct deposit. When we earn the bonus or residual income, we receive it much faster. This is a mirror with quick response. I named this Mirror Type One.

Our customer-gathering and distributor signups tend to lag about 6 weeks after the outreach effort (or lack thereof). The results of our outreach may take a few weeks for us to reap the benefits of a signup. Likewise, if we slack off, it may take several weeks for the signup rate to start decreasing. It is a mirror with a delayed response. I call this Mirror Type Two.

Our inner (personal) growth starts on the inside and may take weeks, months, or years to show on the exterior. This is a mirror with a lengthy delay. I call this Mirror Type Three.

Because the progression toward our goals seems to start with the third type of activity (with the longest time between effort and result), followed by the second type (delay of a few weeks), followed by the first type (delay of 1-7 days), the rewards seem to come in bursts. The effects of the Mirrors seem to stack up at the end of the process, when Mirror Type One shows us the money.

If you experienced bursts of (or sustained) Mirror Type One encounters, I congratulate you on your visible success.

If your Mirror Type One experiences were few or absent during this year, I still am proud of you, and I invite you to look in The Green Mirror.

The Green Mirror is your personal mirror of all the steps that are leading you toward Types One, Two, and Three. It includes all the private struggles and personal victories. It contains the list of all the business activities you may have brushed off as “not enough.” I named these types of progress-toward-goal experiences as Green Lights, and if you feel discouraged about your progress, I strongly suggest you take a look at them. I’m willing to bet you grew more inside than the world gives you credit for.

May you finish Year 2018 with a smile, and may you begin 2019 with joy.

–LYnn Selwa, “The Rocket Science Coach” ™

#lynnselwa #trsc #therocketsciencecoach #ayearagreenmirror #greenmirror #greenlights #mirrortypeone #mirrortypetwo #mirrortypethree #mlm #leveragedsales #partyplan #networkmarketing #directsales #residualincome #residuals

Reminders from a young skater

One of the fun wintertime activities in Stuttgart is attending the month-long annual Weihnachtsmarkt (outdoor Christmas market).

It’s a place to eat bun-cradled Bratwurst and drink steaming Gluehwein while standing on your feet, to shop for gifts while gently pushing your way through crowds… and the bravest will strap on skates at the outdoor ice skating rink.

I am not among the latter.

Yesterday evening my husband, a female friend, and I joined the crowd of onlookers while the musical hits of Billy Joel, Kid Rock, and TOTO filled the air. I sang along while my husband and friend sipped their steaming drinks.

We enjoyed watching the swirling neon spotlights illuminate the skaters as they circled the rink’s center, some weaving through the crowd expertly, others slowly yet confidently pushing their way forward.

The smallest skater was a girl perhaps 5 years old, tightly gripping the chest-high handles of the sliding support shaped like a snowman. She was inching her way forward with no one nearby to assist her.

The white snowman was approximately 3 feet tall and stood firmly on stubby blue skis. A newbie skater could stand behind it, using its stability to keep balance while wobbling forward and pushing it in front of them.

It took the young girl about 15 minutes to make one circuit of the rink. I watched her skates flail in flashing ovals while she barely glided forward, and I realized what was missing: she needed to turn her backmost skate on a slight angle before pushing against it with her foot.

I commented to my friend, “Someone needs to show her the proper way to place her feet. I would do it if I knew more German and put on some skates… I struggled with the same foot-angle issue while learning to roller skate.”

 

By the time the young skater was returning to her starting point, my friend commented, “She’s a fighter, that will take her far in life.”

We watched her exchange a few words with a middle-age adult male who was wearing skates and standing outside the rink; he was probably her father. Then she began a second lap gripping her snowman support. Still skating alone, she moved faster this time, circling the rink in about 10 minutes.

When we saw her face again, she still looked neutral-to-happy. All three of us were impressed, and we guessed at why she didn’t seem frustrated.

“She is enjoying herself,” my friend commented, “and she doesn’t seem scared by the way people are skating quickly past her.” The other skaters were giving her plenty of room, which I imagine helped her stay calm.

I added, “I think she is NOT comparing herself to anyone else. In contrast, she probably is seeing how she is the same as everyone else on the rink: she is SKATING!”

We left as she began her third lap, walking away around 9:30 pm while the music and socializing continued.

This morning as I write this, I also realize no one seemed to tell her that she doesn’t belong on the ice. None of the other skaters appeared to talk to her nor call out a comment while she was skating. After her brief talk with the man, her body language didn’t express any discomfort regarding her progress.

I pulled several lessons from the experience.

  • Stay calm when you’re a beginner
  • Use tools to help you learn
  • Ask for advice when you want to improve
  • Enjoy the process instead of comparing yourself to more advanced participants
  • Give beginners time and room to try their burgeoning skills
  • Keep any verbal insults and frustrations about a beginner’s progress to yourself

    and the most important one:

  • Sometimes there’s a subtle difference between frustrating activity and success

Whether you’re coaching a new business partner, showing a friend how to use a computer program, or advising a child how to ice skate, the same principles apply.

As coaches of our teammates, be aware of the subtle actions that lead to easier and faster success.  The best coaches can observe a person’s activities, discern the skills (obvious or subtle) that are missing, and teach them patiently.

Although she never spoke a word to me, that young skater reminded me of some important facts.

I hope the next time she laces up her skates, the proper technique “clicks in” so she can soar around the rink like the fastest skaters.

–LYnn Selwa, “The Rocket Science Coach ™”

#lynnselwa #therocketsciencecoach #trsc #remind #remindersfromayoungskater #frustration #success #subtle #leveragedsales #partyplan #directsales #mlm #networkmarketing #socialselling #communitybasedselling #residuals

The follower’s version of a song

You might be familiar with an English-language Christmastime song, talking about a man in a red suit who is coming to town. The verses claim that he sees everything you do, and you should be well-behaved.

Leaders, your followers observe you this way all-year-round.

I know all of you readers are human, and I don’t want you to think you have to be perfect if you’re a leader. On the contrary. Humans make mistakes… and your followers are watching closely to see how you handle those situations. A person’s character is revealed both by what a person does, as well as how one tries (or does not try) to make amends for misuse of power and influence.

Followers, watch your leaders. Note what they do well, and also make an Anti-List: they way you will NOT handle a situation, if something similar happens to you.

–LYnn Selwa, “The Rocket Science Coach” ™

#lynnselwa #therocketsciencecoach #trsc #song #thefollowersversionofasong #antilist #leadership #mistakes #christmastime #power #influence #networkmarketing #partyplan #directsales #mlm #leveragedsales

What does boredom cause?

Note: If you are struggling with perpetual defeating thoughts such as”why is everyone so happy” or “they would be better off without me,” please call your medical doctor or visit an hospital emergency room immediately. These thoughts sometimes get stronger and more unbearable around the end-of-year holidays. I may not know you in person, but I assure you that You Matter In This World.  –LS

 

Today I spotted a blog entry regarding boredom, claiming it is a direct cause of depression and suicide. I’m a long-time reader of his work, and he’s no stranger to bold yet thoughtful statements, most of which I respect because of the critical thinking skills he applies in developing them. Today I definitely disagree with his viewpoint. Here are the comments I posted.

“I disagree about boredom as a cause of depression or suicide. Clinical depression and suicidal thoughts are symptoms of an urgent medical situation, and I urge people experiencing those to seek a medical doctor or an emergency room for help, immediately.

When people are perpetually bored, that typically signals being in a rut. I agree that introspection can be helpful in discovering what one truly wants out of life, and those discoveries can uncover some uncomfortable realizations about one’s past decision-making and behavior.

However, for the person who is experiencing suicidal thoughts or clinical depression (not a mild ‘down in the dumps’), self-introspection can easily lead to rumination, which makes the situation worse. The therapist’s job includes guiding the introspection and logical thinking in ways that dig deep yet keep the person’s mind from being a weapon turned against oneself. The very process of therapy typically includes examining every belief one has. (I use the word ‘typically’ here, because there are many modes of psychotherapy.)

I don’t think public speaking is truly people’s number one fear.

Deep introspection is.

Only the brave attempt it, either on their own or with a therapist. Only the bravest make the changes it indicates.”

If you are examining your path in any aspect of your life, I send you strength and courage.

–LYnn Selwa, “The Rocket Science Coach” ™

#lynnselwa #therocketsciencecoach #trsc #depression #suicide #suicidalthoughts #seekmedicalhelp